RBR assistant net-stalkers on strike

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Assistant net-stalkers from rec.bicycles.racing laid down
their keyboards in the middle of a contentious thread about
doping today. They claimed to be protesting unsavory working
conditions and a pay scale consisting only of Cadbury bars:
"It's not that we're greedy," a spokesman said, "We don't mind
the bad pay, we just don't want to be poisoned."

http://www.guardian.co.uk/food/Story/0,,1804951,00.html
Half a million bars of Cadbury's chocolate suspected of being
contaminated with salmonella have been eaten by the public
[in the UK] over the past six months, the company admitted yesterday
as it took seven of its most popular brands off the shelves.

The spokesman refused to give his name, saying "No way, man.
This could get on the internet and there are all kinds of crazy
people on there." RBR chief stalker heather, on vacation in
the south of France, could not be reached for comment, but
WADA chief Dick Pound volunteered to "burn the witches.
There aren't any witches? You haven't been looking hard
enough!"

In other news of the day, web search company Google reported
a mysterious 40% drop in hits to its site. Google executives had no
explanation, beyond blaming "Bill Gates or the NSA or somebody
like that."

[h squared]

wrote:
> Assistant net-stalkers from rec.bicycles.racing laid down
> their keyboards in the middle of a contentious thread about
> doping today. They claimed to be protesting unsavory working
> conditions and a pay scale consisting only of Cadbury bars:
> "It's not that we're greedy," a spokesman said, "We don't mind
> the bad pay, we just don't want to be poisoned."
>
> http://www.guardian.co.uk/food/Story/0,,1804951,00.html
> Half a million bars of Cadbury's chocolate suspected of being
> contaminated with salmonella have been eaten by the public
> [in the UK] over the past six months, the company admitted yesterday
> as it took seven of its most popular brands off the shelves.

umm...oops?
see, it's a *good* thing that you haven't actually received any pay at
all yet :) but at the rate of 2 squares consumed per day, you probably
(probably) wouldn't have noticed anything anyway. so get back to googling!

what disturbs me is a few months ago i had to round up chocolate bars
that had tested high for lead. if this keeps up, soon i'm going to be
afraid to eat the stuff :(

> RBR chief stalker heather, on vacation in
> the south of France, could not be reached for comment

vacation?? you know that there is no rest for the nosey...

h