Obstructions

On Wed, 09 Sep 2009 22:24:27 -0500, z wrote:

AMuzi wrote:
wrote:
On Sat, 29 Sep 2007 21:48:12 -0600, wrote:

I was cruising along the shady, deserted bike path at 20 mph on a
pleasant summer afternoon when--

Not quite deserted!

"Bother!"
Actually, I yelped a different word, one that Winnie the Pooh would
have been ashamed to utter, but he never had to bunny-hop a
camouflaged 3-foot long obstruction stretched across a shady bike
path.
"You stupid @#$%^&+#!!!" I added as I stopped and dropped my bike. I
was afraid that I hadn't bunny-hopped in time and was facing an ugly
job of roadside euthanasia.

Luckily, the obstruction lying across the path was unharmed. It was
basking and partly sunk into the comfortable crack in the photos
below, so a two-inch bunny-hop would have been enough to clear it.
Instead of slithering off, the obstruction coiled up to threaten me,
which is the typical reaction its species:
http://i26.tinypic.com/28rprlz.jpg
http://i32.tinypic.com/e81vdj.jpg
http://i29.tinypic.com/xgmell.jpg
http://i29.tinypic.com/2qb7tw7.jpg

The tail isn't out of focus, it's just vibrating.

Now where's the video setting on the camera? Ah, there it is . . .

The steady buzzing is from the tail, which vibrates too fast to be
seen:
http://tinypic.com/r/2lix6ig/3

Here the buzzing dies down to a rough idle, but then it picksup again:
http://tinypic.com/r/1247l9i/3

Time for a stick to show how stubborn such obstructions a
http://tinypic.com/r/28k0vg7/3

You POKED IT WITH A STICK ???

I will never complain about mere cow poop on the road again.


Not only did he poke it with a stick, but he held the stick with
presumably one hand while holding a video camera with the other. I don't
know whether he was looking at the snake directly or through the
viewfinder of the camera.

Regardless, did you notice how non confrontational the snake was? It was
in defensive mode the entire time it was being provoked.

Dear Z,

Exactly--they just want to be left alone to bask right in the middle
of the path. Instead of fleeing, they coil up and rattle, which works
quite well with their natural enemies.

Unfortunately, the next bicyclist runs over them and kills them. Or
the next fellow, out for a walk with his dog, or the next horseman.

So the decent thing to do is to shoo them off the path or highway and
hope that their tiny brains vaguely associate the path with fearsome
creatures in clown costumes who stop and poke them gently with sticks
until they stop rattling and slither off.

Given a stick or frame pump, it's quite safe. Even the smallest
bicyclist is far too large for them to eat. (Other species behave
differently, so leave them alone if you aren't familiar with them.)

Of course, if you're a squirrel and get too close, you'll find that
they're extremely confrontational:
http://groups.google.com/group/rec.b...07bff10226927f

Cheers,

Carl Fogel

On Thu, 10 Sep 2009 14:51:26 -0400, Still Just Me.
wrote:

On Thu, 10 Sep 2009 00:24:06 -0700, wrote:

Dear John,

Thanks . . .

But I'd never handle a buzzing obstruction--I just shoo it off the
path or highway with a stick or frame pump, showing the kind of icy
courage routinely displayed by the wives of farmers sweeping the walk.

(Except that farmers and their wives often kill the poor creature,
which just coils up and quivers its tail in the mistaken belief that
no one will take a board, place it carefully behind the narrow neck,
and give a good shove.)

That's how helpless they are--their stubborn streak makes them stay
right there, coiled up and buzzing, neither fleeing nor attacking
while someone patiently maneuvers a board into place and crushes their
neck.

The camera time-stamp shows that I bunny-hopped over the dim-witted
thing, stopped, dropped my bike, walked back, spoke severely to the
uninjured but deaf obstruction, pulled my camera out of my waist-pack,
and took the first photo at 3:20:38.

After circling and taking pictures and videos from various angles, I
put the shiny camera down in the path a few feet away as a warning in
case another rider came along.

Then I scrambled a few feet down the far bank of the path for a
handsome stick, telling the obstruction to wait right there--

Which it did.

After considerable prodding, it reluctantly slithered off the middle
of the warm asphalt path and into the bushes at 3:26:55, over six
minutes later.

You pretty much have to step on them (or hold them aloft while crying
out in tongues) to get bitten. Stand a few feet away, and you're in
about as much danger as if you were confronting a snapping turtle.

Interesting. They certainly have a much more aggressive reputation.

I've gone into the snake and slow reptile care business myself on an
ad-hoc basis.

A while back there was smallish 3' water snake (venom factor
undetermined, but probably not dangerous) crossing the street, but at
much to slow a pace for the road he was on and the traffic speed. I
stopped and stood with my bike acting as a guard rail so that he could
meander across. ****ed off a lot of motorists who actually had to take
an extra 5 seconds to go around me and/or stop and then go around me.
Heaven forbid they should be delayed in their route to save a life.

A couple weeks ago there was a turtle slowly working his way across
the road. This guy was endangered, but it didn't make much difference
to me, I help snappers too. I stopped my car as he only needed to
finish crossing the lane I was in. As car came up behind me they were
(once again) quite ****ed that they were going to be delayed five to
10 seconds while I played defense for the turtle.

It's an odd world when people have no respect for other forms of life
that are no threat and just need a little allowance to fit into our
world.

PS - don't try to pick up that snapper - his neck has quite a reach
around the sides and they have little regard for the fact that you're
trying to save their life (voice of experience :-). I assume the same
goes for the rattler .

Dear SJM,

An example of the snapper's long neck:
http://cheezburger.com/View.aspx?aid=2526096384

But the common snapping turtle is actually quite easy to handle safely
if you know how.

Just get behind the turtle, grab its enormous and convenient tail,
lift a little, and slide your hand, palm upward, under the shell from
the back.

Your other hand on the top of the shell will hold the beast steady.

The hind legs can grasp your arm, but they have no angle to claw you.
The front legs can't reach you, and the head and beak can't touch your
top hand, though the turtle may try hard several times before giving
up.

Tested on a few dozen snappers, up to about 30 pounds. I kept them as
pets, years ago.

Just as I'd be cautious with an unfamiliar snake, I'd be darned
cautious if I ever had the good luck to meet the common snapper's
larger cousin, the alligator snapper. For one thing, I couldn't lift
the nearest specimen, a one-eyed hundred-pound beast in the local zoo.

Common snappers are surprisingly phlegmatic and typically calm down
and accept handling within a day at most. Many relax within five
minutes of capture, which lets you to carry them without any fuss a
mile or two down the unexpectedly dry creek to the reservoir. (They
often crawl up creeks after rains and get stuck in dry rocks in the
summer sun.)

Placid or not, a snapper will strike at anything foolish enough to get
within reach of its long neck. I forgot only once, luckily with a tiny
specimen with a shell about half the size of a dollar bill, who
immediately reminded me that anything in front within striking
distance is liable to start bleeding.

In contrast to snappers, I never had a spiny softshell that stopped
thrashing and trying to bite me--utterly different personality.

Cheers,

Carl Fogel

In article ,
John Dacey wrote:

[...]

The beast charges:
http://businesscycles.com/graphics/nikpix/CAM_2757.jpg

Having successfully parried its attack, I left him to amble away to
consider the wisdom of assaulting cyclists -
http://businesscycles.com/graphics/nikpix/CAM_2753.jpg

A real moss-back.

--
Michael Press

On Sat, 29 Sep 2007 21:48:12 -0600, wrote:

[snip]

A modest corn obstruction obligingly stayed still and posed while I
fumbled new batteries into my camera and two other bicyclists rode
past, on either side of it:
http://i26.tinypic.com/2cmvlol.jpg

Here it shows a slightly truncated tail:
http://i27.tinypic.com/2vaob5k.jpg

The last thing some field mice get to see:
http://i31.tinypic.com/24nppit.jpg

They look bigger up closer:
http://i31.tinypic.com/r2qjup.jpg

Cheers,

Carl Fogel

On Sat, 29 Sep 2007 21:48:12 -0600, wrote:

[snip]

Some really bad camouflage caught my eye.

This obstruction normally lurks in green, well-watered suburban
gardens, not miles outside the city limits in the dry, brown prairie
next to a tumbleweed:
http://i35.tinypic.com/2ytv2ty.jpg

Most attempts to focus failed, but here the devil's horse peers into
the camera lens:
http://i35.tinypic.com/xolglg.jpg
http://i36.tinypic.com/103bi2u.jpg

Another lucky-focus, showing the decidedly non-green surroundings
http://i35.tinypic.com/dxd8vc.jpg
http://i35.tinypic.com/xf2no2.jpg

Cheers,

Carl Fogel

On Sat, 29 Sep 2007 21:48:12 -0600, wrote:

Next to the windy road today, a fleet obstruction crawls under another
obstruction after hearing "Boo!" twice:
http://tinypic.com/r/2yns278/4

Unlike deer, they never jump barb-wire fences.

The 4-foot tall fencepost on the right looks even taller because it
has an extension pole.

Cheers,

Carl Fogel

On Sat, 29 Sep 2007 21:48:12 -0600, wrote:

An obstruction blending into the surroundings:
http://i35.tinypic.com/5yck0o.jpg

Less impressive camouflage:
http://i38.tinypic.com/30jpxg2.jpg

Just sunning:
http://i37.tinypic.com/2lmnf4o.jpg

Cheers,

Carl Fogel

On Sat, 29 Sep 2007 21:48:12 -0600, wrote:

[snip]

The cold snap brought out a few familiar obstructions.

Why is this obstruction lolling in such an eye-catching fashion near
the right-angle corner of the south forty, right next to the road,
just before the cold front arrived?
http://i33.tinypic.com/ix87j9.jpg

He's keeping an eye on this saucy little obstruction, who's right in
the fence-corner:
http://i36.tinypic.com/ml6m3b.jpg

She's a teasing little tart:
http://i36.tinypic.com/1jarz9.jpg
http://i33.tinypic.com/2lks8s5.jpg
http://i34.tinypic.com/dd7py.jpg

She's squatting in the last photo, not jumping. Don't ask.

***

The cold snap left a large aquatic obstruction oddly obscured:
http://i38.tinypic.com/2v18847.jpg

That's the dam, right in the middle, at the end of the reservoir
between the bluffs. For some reason, I heard no jet skis or speedboats
towing anyone on water-skis.

***

It's hard to ignore an obstruction posing next to the road like this,
even when you're not sure exactly what kind of obstruction it is:
http://i33.tinypic.com/2gw6m9u.jpg

Ah, a ferruginous obstruction:
http://i34.tinypic.com/b8703a.jpg
http://i38.tinypic.com/105pgxy.jpg

***

The cold snap left this 3-inch obstruction lying on the icy ground,
but it twitched a little when I stopped and picked it up, so I took it
home and let it warm up on a kitchen table:
http://i37.tinypic.com/20gyyw5.jpg

***

Yesterday, the cold snap ended, so these obstructions were all
over--they're leaping the fence _toward_ the bike path:
http://i37.tinypic.com/16ld3xd.jpg
http://i33.tinypic.com/vobe6w.jpg

***

This non-venomous 3-foot obstruction was sticking half-way out onto
the bike path today, straight as a poker and just as motionless, but
it coiled up, hissed, and struck when I got behind it:
http://i33.tinypic.com/2luqgqv.jpg

The vibrating bare tail is just visible. The buzzing sound in the
first movie is from nearby insects, not the harmless obstruction's
quivering tail. The grunting is from the photographer, bending over
awkwardly.

http://tinypic.com/player.php?v=2ln90np&s=4
http://tinypic.com/player.php?v=2preeqr&s=4

In dry leaves, the tail-shiver makes a useful defensive imitation of a
real rattle, but it's no match for the real thing, since it isn't
backed up by poison fangs.

Naturally, the obstruction declined to shake its tail in this pose:
http://i37.tinypic.com/m7txe.jpg

Cheers,

Carl Fogel

On Sat, 29 Sep 2007 21:48:12 -0600, wrote:

[snip]

A shorter obstruction of a slightly different species was lying across
the same spot on the bike path that was blocked yesterday.

At first it hoped that no one would notice it:
http://i33.tinypic.com/2rqyo9k.jpg
http://i36.tinypic.com/2ex0vbp.jpg
http://i35.tinypic.com/2nbf3wo.jpg

Then it curled and constricted:
http://i37.tinypic.com/2vuneyu.jpg
http://i35.tinypic.com/350pcpi.jpg

Always ready for Halloween with a skull-mask:
http://i36.tinypic.com/23wlhd0.jpg
http://i36.tinypic.com/vyaadd.jpg

Released, it relaxed and posed:
http://i38.tinypic.com/axb4o1.jpg

Cheers,

Carl Fogel

On Sat, 29 Sep 2007 21:48:12 -0600, wrote:

These darned obstructions are crowding the bike path in the fine fall
weather:
http://i38.tinypic.com/izw786.jpg

Cheers,

Carl Fogel